So a few days ago I awoke to the
special joy of it being the same temperature outside as it was
inside. Which was cold. Because of course the fuel oil furnace had
refused to turn on. Which was super great for my stress levels. I
mean it's totally not like our 40 to 30 degree weather has me burning
firewood that I had set aside for the dark cold depths of winter and
also the wood stove cranks the inside temperature into the Sahara or
anything.
I mean, it's not like we already paid
someone to come out and fix it once.
Ha ha hah no. Fuck.
So I awoke to the super balls cold of
47 degrees and put on thermals and made a fire and then played an
extra special round of what is wrong with the furnace this time. Of
course when hitting the reset button failed to produce an furnace
operating epiphany, we fell back on the old standby of poking it a
few times and then went to find the list of things the old dude who
had come to fix it said we might have to replace at some point.
Because we were now at “some point.”
Unfortunately because of our work
schedules we could not make it to the store during the hours it was
actually open because I only know of one store that even sells fuel
oil furnace parts and it is a locally run store that isn't open on
Sunday and past five. Which was also unfortunate because my body
picked that night to become hellishly sick and I spent a good chunk
of time huddled on the bathroom floor at 47 degrees.
Which was, if you are wondering, the
exact opposite of fun.
It was also the exact opposite of
fixing that furnace.
It also meant that I had to miss work.
Which pissed me the shit off because unless I am actively dying to
the point that Jesus is coming for me and I can see the light of
heaven I usually go to work. Because money.
So after wandering around the ice cold
motherfucking mobile home I decided to make a fire and crank the
stove up to like eighty because my skin hurt too much for me to just
put on a goddamn sweater and then I tried not to think about how cold
it was going to get overnight because there was no way in hell I was
going to get up at 2am and put more wood in the stove.
So I spent another freezing ass night
where I realized that the dog is only capable of heating my torso
even if I put him under the blankets with me and then my legs felt
like stiff pieces of wire and like they were trying to get a divorce
from my torso and then Scott came home and we went to buy more
furnace parts.
Of course we were going to take
pictures of the parts with our phones because planning and then we
didn't because bad planning and in the end we just bought what the
sales guy said would fit our stove based on our loose description of
what we had.
It's how we roll.
Which was when we learned that a new
CAD Cell Eye, you know the bit that regulates the fire and whatnot is
like 8 bucks and a new door switch is like, 19 because the door
switch is made out of unicorn horn or someshit. So we were just like
whatever we need this to work and then we get home and of course it
isn't the right CAD Cell thing because ha ha fuck you Holly and your
shit dreams.
So now we are going out to buy the
other CAD Cell Eye thingadoozer and then try to install it and then
if that doesn't work I am building a blanket fort in my office and
living in it with the dog until spring.
You know like a mature adult would do.
Okay.
I guess Scott can come too.
