(Okay I kinda wrote this post before the backhoe tire was fixed, but then I forgot about it, and then I was all like, shit, I never posted that!? So here you go. A story from when we didn't have 20in of snow.)
So today, we reached the dizzying high
crest of 42 degrees. Shocking I know. So we decided it was finally
time to finish tamping the dirt down around the electric pole we put
in so that we could get electric service to the house.
Because you kinda need electricity.
Unless you are one of them back to the
land hippie backwoods type folks that shun our modern convinces like
plumbing and electricity because jobs are for squares man. Except I
can't live like that because I want to enjoy Internet and pooping
from within the comfort and safety of my own house. That's just what
houses are for right? I mean, that's what separates the noble house
from the proud yet scary looking cabin.
Anyway.
So we get our giant metal pry bars with
the blunt ends that we use for tamping and go at. Since you know, the
backhoe has a flat tire, and also the ground is so wet that we
couldn't even ride I bicycle over there without sinking like a doomed
ship. So we grabbed our pry bars a shovel, and our foolish optimism
and started in.
Everything seemed great at first, but
it quickly dawned on us that we just spearing glory holes* in the
earth, which is the consistency of burnt pudding. So then I come up
with the super brilliant idea of using a board to even out the force.
So I found a board and threw it into the mud and wailed on it.
Which promptly broke the board in
half.
So then Scott comes up the idea to use
a better board. Which worked great. All we did was pivot the board
around the pole in the circle while we lifted our huge heavy ass pry
bars and brought them down over and over again onto the board.
Which we only had to do, oh twice all
the way around and then again by going across so that the area
didn't look like a giant pie tin after all the pie pieces had been
taken out.
But we did it!
Except now my arms feel like noodles
and I am really aware that I am resting my wrists on the keyboard and
that makes me keep missing certain letters because my arms have given
up on life man.
So I think I am going to take
some pain killers and go to bed drink alcohol and surf the
Internet like a mindless worker bee until it's late enough to go to
bed and not feel like a boring person.
So, good night dear readers, even
though I shall not post till morning, never doubt that I love you.
(In a totally platonic way of course.**)
*Yes I know what this means. Yes I went
there. If you do not know what this means, for the love of all that
is holy, DO NOT Google it. No. Don't. Trust me.
** Please don't stalk and murder me.
I'm imagining all kinds of noodle-armed people now.
ReplyDeleteI think that image is going to keep me entertained for quite some time!