Friday, December 30, 2011

New Years Resolutions

Ah, a new year is upon us. I have never really understood peoples obsession with resolutions. Most likely they are setting up highly unattainable goals in the hopes that they can absolve themselves of some guilt. I don't like to make promises against myself. And I don't really enjoy feeling that heady mixture of guilt and shame that comes with mostly inevitable failure.     

However, there were some things that happened this year that I feel I could I could have done better on. So I decided that in the end I would make some resolutions for myself.

1. Eat more cookies. I haven't done nearly enough of this. And they have to be good cookies too. None of that cheap store bought crap.

2. Read more books. I love to read books. The only problem is I don't have a lot of time with which to obtain books. So my resolution is to read more of them. Somehow.

3. Play more video games.

4. Find more gatherings where it is acceptable to drink expensive mixed drinks for free. Preferably the ones that contain chocolate.

I think that covers it pretty well. Here's hoping I can keep to all of them.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Chirstmas And Other Assorted Fun Things.

So, I managed to get sick the week before Christmas. The sort of terrible energy draining sickness that left me laying on the bed face down for awhile. I should also point out that if Scott hadn't been wonderful and wrapped the presents that my family would have gotten their gifts wrapped in festive plastic bags.

Since I'm on antibiotics, I also have the nausea and loss of appetite that goes with that. I might be going out on a limb here, but I'm going to say it's probably the worst Christmas ever. Here's why.

1. BOTH of Scott's laptops were attacked by viruses. Both times all his programs were wiped clean off. Every. Single. One.  

2. Two days before Christmas my outdoor cat emoticon shows up with her face covered in blood and hole in her check that she got somehow. I have no idea how these things keep happening. No vets are open Christmas weekend.*

3. I have never had a migraine, until Friday, when I've had one everyday since then.

4. This is the first Christmas without my father.

5. Scott's medication is once again giving him problems.

 So all in all not one of my better Christmases. I like seeing my family and all, but I could really take or leave Christmas. I don't even have a tree. I'm not sure I even want a tree. Maybe I can just put Christmas lights on the upright base next year and call it even.

* Okay I know there is an emergency clinic in town but I'll be damned if I am paying emergency Christmas time money for a cat that can't go a whole week without injuring herself somehow.


Tuesday, December 20, 2011

The Door Mystery

So, apparently, Scott forgot to shut the door last night. He had been outside petting our out door kitty, Emoticon, and must not have shut the door all the way when he came back in. So some point around 3am, I wake up to a horrible crashing sound, followed by the sound of two cats screaming at each other. Now this is not an unusual sound, as my outdoor cats tend to get if fights with each other over the food dish or the best sleeping spots. It's just that this time, the sound seemed to be coming from inside the house.

I jumped up, and headed into he living room, where I saw that every rug had been over turned. The next thing I noticed was that my indoor cats food dish had been chipped along one side, and was laying off the place mat on the floor. I immediately heading out onto the porch, not knowing what to expect.

There in front of me, was my indoor cat, Dianna. Her tail was extremely bushy and she looked absolutely startled to see me, and there by the door, glaring back at me, was Emoticon. It was then that I noticed the door was ajar, not enough for Emoticon to get back out, but enough to have let her in.

Now the thing you have to understand about Emoticon is she can only see out of one eye. Somehow she sustained a puncture wound to her right eye, and it is now mostly scar tissue. The vet had given us eye drops, but it had been very hard to give them to her on any sort of constant basis. It still makes me sad that this had to happen to her, but she stills seems to hunt just fine, and is otherwise a healthy happy cat.

However, only being able to see out of one eye means, that when she is persevered to be under attack, she starts yowling and flailing and clawing wildly. It's kinda funny to see, unless your seeing it happening at 3 am in on your porch. She stopped when she saw me, and turned. I moved towards her, intent upon opening the door, when she must have decided she had had enough of this, and manged to open it herself and flee into the night.

Dianna and I looked at each other for a long minute before she carefully sat down and started grooming the fuzziness back out of her tail. After making sure the door the fully shut this time, I picked up pieces and moved the dish up to the counter. I went back to bed, where neither my husband, or the dog had moved.

Thank god it wasn't murderers,or something. I could have died.

Way to back me up there guys.


Saturday, December 17, 2011

Chicken Coup 3: Fighting the Good Fight.

It snowed on our chicken coup a few days ago. Luckily, the weather warmed back up to a balmy 45 degrees, allowing us to resume work.

So despite the fact that my period is here and it feels like my uterus is trying to punch its way out, we did a lot today.

First off we placed the last of the panels on inside and out, and then I used great stuff to seal up all the cracks in the walls. Then we grabbed the windows and wrestled them into place. I have this theory that windows are like the goats of the building world, in the they are high spirited, rather heavy, have some moving parts, and also want to stir up as much trouble as possible. The window fought bravely against going into the wall, knowing in their smug ass way that they cannot be pounded into place for fear of breaking the glass.

More Great Stuff was applied around the windows, and then I had just enough time to get one exterior wall painted. I can also safely say that I much prefer setting a ladder on frozen snow covered ground then on mud.

The mud has been the bane of this project since we started, sucking at our boots, and throwing us down inclines. Not to mention all the times it tried to throw us off the ladders.

So hopefully in the next three days I can get the damn thing painted, both inside and out. It's a pretty big building though, with a lot of ladder work, so the going is slow. And of course there is rain forecast because there is always rain forecast when I have to paint something.

Anywho, I am going to give it my best, god damn it. Wish me luck.

Want More Chicken Coup Adventure? Here's Part Four. 

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Chicken Coup 2: The Revenge

Okay so we got the roof plywood up, and the tar/roofing paper/whatever the fuck you call it up and on, so the roof should be able to withstand the rain. We also put up the most of the OSB on the inside, and cut it out for the windows and managed to install one.

Long story short, my whole body hurts. Let me tell you something about using a Sawzall while on a ladder that is sitting in about 5 inches of mud. It sucks ass. I don't seem to have whatever amount of upper body strength that is required to hold the thing and saw with it at the same time. Also, when you least suspect it, it will catch on something and push back at you violently. It is like the Sawzall is waiting for you to let your guard down so it can throw you backwards off the ladder. Kinda like that scene in the lion king where Scar throw Mufasa off the cliff face but instead of having a herd of wildebeest below me I have a bunch of rocks and old boards with nails sticking out of them.

I hate the Sawzall deeply is what I'm saying. With the passion of a thousand fiery suns.

It hurts to type. Also, I have a bunch of other projects I'm neglecting. Like you know, digging that Internet trench and getting some Mobile Home Insurance. Yay. Hope this place doesn't burn to the ground anytime soon.

I just hope that we can finish this thing before Friday, because I have a job I have to go to and it's an overnight thing meaning Holly won't be sleeping very much. After this week I think I'm going to laze around and play video games until my brains come out of my ears. And get fat.

I am going to lay around and look at he Internet now.

Want More Chicken Coup Adventure? Here's Part Three.  

Thursday, December 8, 2011

The Chicken Coup: A Saga In The Making

I am not winning. After missing a golden chance to build the new chicken coup, when the weather guys swore up and god damned down that it was going to rain and then it totally didn't, we realized that there was another string of nice days coming up.

All of my pent up frustration over the sunshine and warmth when there was supposed to rain and cold led us to decide to rebuild the coup during this supposed stretch of nice weather.* This, in retrospect, was a bad idea.

We have been working on this god damned thing for 4 fucking days and we haven't even got the plywood on the roof yet, let alone the metal roofing. It might rain tomorrow and that would be bad, also Scott has a doctors appointment at 2:30, meaning we are going to be stopping working at about 1pm. Meaning that I think we are fucked. Can you put metal roofing on in the rain? You know it's going to rain for two freaking days and then be balls fucking cold? Here is a breakdown of how our days went so far.

Day 1. Lots of optimism. Went to Lowes and got shafted on on a bunch of lumber for the framing. Got back and assembled the front wall (the hardest wall) before it got too cold. The sun sets at 4pm, so that is when we stop working. And by set we mean goes behind the god damned ridge and the temperature immediately drops by about 5 degrees like someone flipped a god damned switch.

Day 2. Wait for frost to kinda melt off before we start. Finish framing. Slightly less optimism, a lot of 'wait did I measure that right?' Decide we should pick up the OSB and sheathing for the walls. Off to Lowes again for some more price raping. Come back and it's dark.

Day 3. Decided lack of optimism. Realize we need an 8ft A frame ladder to reach the highest point on the roof. We no not have a 8ft A frame ladder. All we have are 2 sketchy as hell hand me down ladders that my father had. We put OSB on. Got the back wall completely sheathed inside and out, as well as most of the outside done. Congratulations are in order. Drive to town to buy food and ladder. Can't find a an 8ft ladder. Eat cheese cake.

Day 4. Everything goes to hell and optimism is buried at the crossroads in a shallow grave. Framed all the windows and the door. I can tell you right now, strait up, that cutting windows out of the motherfucking sonofabitch sheathing is harder than fuck all. There are not enough curse words in the whole of the English language to convey how much this sucked. Got all of the windows cut out, and one of the two vents done, but now we get to do it all over again with the OSB, which was not been fully done on the inside of the walls yet. Got the roof rafters up.

So tomorrow we have to:

Install plywood on roof, add roofing paper/tar paper/whatever the fuck it's called.

Place on the metal roofing.

Place and cut the OSB.

Sand down the areas around the doors and windows because our cuts are not perfect.

Install windows.

Paint Structure inside and out.

I think were fucked. Straight up fucked and we will be lucky to finish the roof plywood before he has to leave for the doctors. I don't think we are getting all that done in 4 hours. I think we are going to be putting the metal roofing on in 36 degree weather.


* Nice weather meaning above 50 Degrees.

Looking for more Chicken Coup Adventures? Here's Part Two.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Mold Is Trying To Murder Me.

I found in mold in both my closets. Leading me to a massive throwing out of stuff.

I have no idea what to do about that. Hardest hit were all the things I can't just throw in the washer, like my wedding dress, and Halloween costumes, and my art portfolio.

I don't really know how to fix this problem. I'm going to move some stuff over to the other mobile home, but I know that has had mold problems in the past too. The only thing I can think to do is put everything into plastic bins in the new trailer make sure that there is a good gap between the bins and the walls in order to maintain air flow. Air out the clothes in the cold winter air, and then use a good home dry cleaning kit.

This winter has been unusually warm and wet, and I think that was the problem. We would normally be running the wood stove by now, and the hot dry air would kill off the mold, but this year, it's been so warm we have hardly even needed the oil furnace.

So here we are.

I want to start taking stuff over and organizing it, but the problem is that in order to put things into the new closet, I have to take a whole bunch of crap out of the new closet. You know, the crap I was planning on storing in this mobile home. That I can't move over here until I've removed things like, you know, my desk. It's a closed loop system here people.

Also, I'm not sure how crazy I should be getting with this? Should I bleach every container before taking it over? As far as I know these mold spores are everywhere anyways, that's why shit in the fridge will mold when it goes bad. Should I bleach everything? The Internet makes it sound like this is some sort of mold apocalypse where I have to put up plastic sheeting and wear a respirator and drown things in a mountain of bleach and sprinkle baking soda everywhere and then vacuum like there is no god damned tomorrow and possibly burn the vacuum afterwards.

Scott's solution was to make me fudge, possibly to make up for he fact that he had no idea what to do, and also that none of his things got destroyed. Mmmm fudge. Fudge makes everything better.

I guess my day is going to be comprised of washing things and eating fudge and bleaching stuff.

Fun. Fuck. Fudge?