Monday, February 6, 2012

The Chick Coup Saga: The Roof

So over the past week we tore down the old chicken coup. And by we I mean Scott. I mostly helped move boards around and generally tried to look busy and vital to the process.

The first step was to remove the old metal roof, which would become the new metal roof through the use of the magic of reusing. Scott fought his way on top of the structure, which I missed because I was paying the fuel oil guy money for precious, precious heat. I think I can capture the experience with these carefully selected quotes:

“This roof pitch is steeper then I thought.”

“Okay, it's very slippery up here. Really slippery.”

“Here tie a knot around the hammer and the crow bar so I can pull it up. If you tie it like that the crowbar will fall out and hit you... this is an interesting knot.”

Once the roof was down Scott bashed the building apart with a sledge hammer over a period of about two days. If you are wondering why I didn't get to use the sledge hammer, it's because I wield a hammer like a drunk monkey. I have no ability to aim. Anything with hammer in the name is like my Kryptonite. If you named a drink The Hammer I would toss it back and hit myself in the eye.
Anyway, the actual putting on of the roof went fast, since we did not have to cut any pieces. Scott was up on the roof and I just handed him up sections.

Immediately after we had placed on the last bit it started to snow. We have about an inch outside. Don't be fooled into thinking the weather was on our side though. It's not. It was trying so hard to snow all morning and fuck up our plans, it was just late to the party. You could almost hear the weather shouting for us not to work so fast. It's just up there lurking. Waiting. Watching.

Me paranoid? Never. That's crazy.

Want More Chicken Coup Adventure? Here's The Final Part. (Thank God.)


  1. Do you ever visit Vesta Vayne at The Cowardly Feminist? She would be able to devise a drink for you called The Hammer. You should suggest it!

    I just found you and intend to read all your archives because I'm truly LOLing here.

    1. Yay! Somebody loves me! Wow. You know when you write something and you don't expect anybody to read it and then people do and your all like 'this is awesome!?' Yeah I feel like that right now.